RELEASING WITH LOVE
("Detachment with Love")
Courtesy of Neil Uptegrove

 

The following excerpt is geared to someone you love who is an alcoholic. However, this can be useful to a person who may have any addiction - drugs, gambling, sex, etc.

 

Releasing with love means separating the personality you love
from the disease you despise. It means accepting the afflicted one
unconditionally as an individual of worth and dignity, while stead-
fastly rejecting the destructive influences of alcoholism on yourself
and on the family members.

Releasing with love means caring enough to relinquish your
fantasies and fictions to accept the full reality of the alcoholic
condition, and the reality of yourself as well.

Releasing with love means foreswearing anger, resentment,
fear, recrimination, self-justification, false pride, and actions taken
dispassionately, in loving wisdom and with calm resolve.

Releasing with love is a course of constructive independence,
not a license for retaliatory self-indulgence. It is an assertion of
your human rights, not a usurpation of those of the alcoholic. It is
a tool for serenity, not a weapon for retribution.

Releasing with love means being:
...objective, but not indifferent;
...flexible, but not indecisive;
...firm, but not hard;
...wise, but not clever;
...patient but not resigned;
...strong, but not overbearing;
...resolute, but not stubborn;
...compassionate, but not indulgent.

Releasing with love is profound love, wrapped in understanding
and bound by courage, helping you to live with serenity and fulfillment
in spite of the environment, and in constant readiness for the alcoholic's
decision for sobriety...even without its expectation.

 

If you are worried about a family member or friend who drinks too much and are not sure how you can help, call Al~Anon/Alateen______________________________________________1-800-356-9966